When Being A Fireman Was Fun Before They Screwed It Up Poster

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  • You catch sight of yourself in one of those 180-degree mirrors and you realise you can see the outline of every bun you've ever eaten. That should have put me off leggings for life.

    But I was overcome with excitement to see that my old friends had made a comeback on the catwalks.

    But the modern legging needn't just be a look for jail-bait. Even though my bottom is not where it used to be and my idea of hell is to 'go clubbing', I, too, shall be investing in several pairs of matt black leggings.

    It's just that this time around, instead of teaming them with a bottom-skimming slogan sweatshirt, I shall take inspiration from the Anna Molinari fashion show and wear them under a short little black dress.

    In a final, defiant gesture, I shall also team them with the kind of serious pointy-toe investment shoes no 17-yearold could possibly afford. You see, there really is a fashion god.

  • No, says Victoria Coren

    Don't tell me that leggings are back in fashion. I'm not making that mistake again.

    I wore them the first time round and like drinking Babycham, holidaying with Club 18-30 or watching a cricket match, once was more than enough.

    Twice begins to look like carelessness.

    Perhaps you are cheering the comeback of leggings like the return of a long-lost friend. Believe me, they are a false friend.

    They feel all comfy and welcoming, while secretly making you look like a pound of sausages wrapped in clingfilm. They pretend to hide bulk, while actually highlighting it.

    They are the equivalent of the friend who murmurs reassurance to your face, then has a good laugh behind your back.

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